Post #15 - No More Running

I didn't want to write this post tonight. I wanted to write about something else, and even started writing about the other topic, but God brought me back to this. The post might be a little late (because I'm not posting it until it's just right), but I pray someone is blessed by it... 


I went through a period in my life where I felt lost and didn't know what my purpose was on this earth. I constantly asked God to reveal it to me. I asked God to use me and let me be of service. I needed to feel like I had a place... a reason to live.

Then He told me what He wants me to do.

WHAT?!?! You want me to do WHAT?!

When God shared with me what He required of me, I thought there was NO WAY I could do that! I thought that what He said was SO MUCH bigger than me! That I could never accomplish all of that. I could NEVER do what He was saying!

So, I did the only thing I thought I could do...

I ran.

I ran for a long time.

I did not think, for the life of me, that I was going to be able to do what God had said. I didn't think I was capable or worthy of doing it.

And I was DETERMINED that I would not do it.

I made all types of excuses of why I not only WOULD not do it, but why I COULD not do it... It was not what I wanted for myself. I did not want that kind of exposure (I still don't, really). It was not what I had ever envisioned myself doing. It's not ME, or where or who I wanted to be...

This wasn't right!! How could I be the one God had chosen for this?? How could He possibly expect this from me??

Fear had me bound and believing that I couldn't do what God was calling me to.

And I continued to run and make excuses. And be disobedient.

I refused to move when I was told to move. I refused to believe that I could do something so big.

Then God did an amazing thing in me... He changed my mind.

He helped me to begin to see myself through His eyes... and changed my vision!

I still think that my purpose is so much bigger than me. But, now I understand that if it weren't, I wouldn't need God to do it.

If I could do it all myself, I might want to take the glory for myself. I might be tempted to believe that I did it on my own.

In all that He does in and through us, it is God that deserves the glory, not us.

In fact, it's not about us at all!

God doesn't use us to showcase us. He uses us so that WE can showcase HIM.

And because God is with me, because He is leading me, step by step, to my purpose, I know that I CAN do it. And I know that I will be hidden behind Him.

"Baby steps," is what He tells me. I'm taking it slow and not allowing anyone (not even myself) to rush the process. God is patient and kind and He does not push us beyond our capabilities.

Instead, He shows us what we are capable of and encourages us forward... right into our purpose.

So, I was right. I wasn't capable of accomplishing the grandness of my purpose on my own. But, I can do all things through Christ (Philippians 4:13). I CAN do it with God's guidance.

With God, all things possible (‎Matthew 19:26). It's even possible for me to believe that I can accomplish the purpose He has called me to.

I can step out of my comfort zone and step into His perfect will.

I now trust that I can follow God and He will lead me safely to my purpose.

And I am no longer running.